Hi Alec:
I'm sorry you were having trouble with the forum. The issue with requiring a spouse/partner was a configuration error. It was actually helpful in encouraging people to sign up their spouse/partners for accounts, but it did occasionally generate confusion and/or angst with people who either didn't have a partner or didn't want to register them for an account. That configuration setting has been fixed, so you should no longer be required to setup a spouse/partner account.
As a sad side-effect of the requirement for a spouse/partner account, some people setup a second account, but used the same email address. That caused even more issues because they would turn off email delivery from the forums in their own account, but not realize that they ALSO had to turn off the same emails in the spouse/partner account that used the same email address.
We have made an explicit choice to subscribe members automatically to the few main forums because it's both our primary way of getting information out to members and it encourages interaction.
Hope fully, with the requirement to setup a spouse/partner account removed, this will be less of an issue.
Mark Tilden
Selene 60 "Koinonia"